Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
