This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
