can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
