Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
