do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
