I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
She's the barista slut.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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