Rock
Scissors
Fuck
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
