He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
