just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize