After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Randomize
