Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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