Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Randomize
