I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
