So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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