Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize
