shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
