he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
