She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.�
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
