I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
