her vagine was all disorganized.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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