and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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