I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
