hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
