The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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