Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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