i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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