Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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