if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize
