So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
