farters have to be the big spoon...
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
