Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
