You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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