I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
