I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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