I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
