garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
A+ Viking dick
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
