I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
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