how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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