dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
