Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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