Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I need water and some morals
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
