I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
