He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
false alarm, still single
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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