Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
