As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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