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• (517): View more from Michigan

  he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.

  (231): View more from Michigan

  better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week

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• (971): View more from Oregon

  you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it

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• (801): View more from Utah

  The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.

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• (949): View more from California

  I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.

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• (925): View more from California

  I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.

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• (502): View more from Kentucky

  I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.

  Fav 0 141 7

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