I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
