I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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