The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
