Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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